Transparent Meanings Of Normalcy
by xXLookAPandaXx
Summary: And she didn’t think she could ever dare herself to love Effy Stonem


**Title**:

Transparent Meanings Of Normalcy

**Rating**:

PG-13  
**Pairing**:

Katie/Effy

**Plot**:

And she didn't think she could ever dare herself to _love _Effy Stonem

**A/N:**

Okay, yeah this is actually influenced from the movies "Lost and Delirious" and "Imagine Me and You". If you have seen Imagine Me and You, then you will notice I actually used a quote from the movie.  
**Disclaimer**:

I don't own Skins. Or anything related to it.

**Off Topic Note:**  
So, I was rewatching both Lost and Delirious and Imagine Me and You, and I realized Piper Perabo is in both. And I LOVED her as Paulie in Lost and Delirious. And if you guys haven't seen those two movies you totally should. Like, seriously Imagine Me & You is ADORABLE. Plus "H" is totally a cute little kid, no lie. She reminds me of me...when I was younger. Also, yeah this story is actually influenced from both movies. I even inserted a quote from Imagine Me & You into the story.

---

Katie Fitch's upper lip curled upward in a clear snarl. She wasn't gay. Because, she just wasn't like that. She wasn't _Emily. _But, Katie was beginning to understand all the fuss being made, all the attention sought, and all for Effy Stonem. Teeth sunk into the skin of her left shoulder, and Katie wrenched her eyes shut, squeezing them tightly as words flung from her lips in a string of murmured curses. She could feel her body was being rocked back and forth, but not on her own accord but by that of a broad shouldered male figure. Her mind was whizzing with thoughts that sped away from the situation, away from what was going on. But, she couldn't escape the sounds that filled her ears. All the disgusting groans and grunts and pleading for more.

"Ah _fuck. _Babe" was whispered low and huskily into her ear. And, she tilted her head back, the force sending her back to arch into a last thrust. A shrill scream slipped past her parted mouth. The sound rose up into the air and was quickly muffled by the force of a male mouth to her own, hungry and full of lust. She responded, out of habit, if anything.

Later, she could feel his finger trace her body, forming unknown shapes into her skin. And she shouldn't, but she couldn't help but shudder from his heavy breath that tickled her flesh, forcing hairs to stand up on the back of her neck. They didn't _love _each other. If anything, she had a certain level of dislike dealing with her current affair. But it didn't stop her from taking what she could. She needed it, yeah. Or that was what she told herself when she had time to catch her breath, and when it seemed that she couldn't be heard. Yeah, the feelings of having someone scream her name, and claw at her skin. But, it _had _to be a male, or she wouldn't be satisfied. That was what she had thought. Yet, now, she felt more empty than usual, and it caused her to tug the sheets around her body as she scooted away from him.

"Something a matter?" His voice questioned, as his eyes focused on her own, for only a brief second. It wasn't long before she shook off any questions of her sanity. So, they settled for silence and a spliff split between the two of them.  
"Cook?" the name left her lips, burning her tongue as the parted.  
"Mhm?" He took a hit from the spliff, and let the smoke envelope him completely, relaxing him.  
"You still...love her?" She turned her face away, not wanting to look at Cook, to reveal just how much she may feel for the same girl, the same person. Her teeth sunk themselves into her plump bottom lip, holding the skin prisoner. Cleaned, pink painted nails dug into her palms forming crescent shaped moons as she waited for his response.  
"I _always_ will." His voice seemed, far off, and with a spared glance Katie had spotted that James Cook's face had softened completely. "Not that you're half bad, love"

This was a moment, Katie was sure, would burn into her mind, at least for a little time. The one time, she figured, that Cook and her were civil and on a plane of understanding together. They both wanted someone, some thing, they both could never have. _Effy Stonem and love. _In this silent moment, Katie would revel in how they both understood this, and so they would fuck the problem away, till it haunted them the next day. It was a time like this that left Katie with a little tad bit of knowledge. A change of opinion in a way. Because, she slowly realized, Cook wasn't really that bad. And Effy was _really _missing out.

"Can't see why." came Katie's words, though she knew exactly why people tripped all over Effy. Why she had done the same, though, she was in a constant state of denying the alluring appeal of the stoic Stonem.  
"Mmm. Can't see what?" Cook turned back to stare at Katie evenly.  
"Why anybody would love such a _whore._" The disdain dripped from every word that fell from her tongue.

She had watched as Cook left the room, clothes in hand and a cheeky smirk plastered to his slightly handsome faces. _God, _what the hell had she just done? Slept with Cook? And, the most disturbing thing about it all was that she had even…_bonded _with the wanker.

Her eyes shot up to see Emily entering their room, alone for once. The look on her twins face said it all. But, Katie wouldn't give her the satisfaction of knowing her reasoning for anything, for fucking Cook.

"_What?" _Katie spat out, pulling the covers over her nude body.

"Why was _he _here?" Came Emily's hushed question. And as if Katie needed to know who she was referring to, Emily nodded her head to the closed door. " Are you…_together? _"

"No Ems" a perfect roll of the eyes came and went. "We just both wanted a good fuck. All right?"

That day, a moment later, she found herself looming over the sink spewing out all the hate, all the jealousy, all the _lust _she was feeling_. _And she didn't stop till her throat was tightened and her voice scratchy, and until she felt normal again. Though it was fleeting, but she would take what she could.

---

_That fucking whore. _The thought swirled its way through the chambers of the Fitch's mind. Crinkling her eyes, and nose, she could only watch in disgust. Perhaps, even jealousy, as Effy Stonem danced along side Freddy McLaire. _Only a whore dances like that._

She scolded herself for watching too long, yet she didn't dare turn away. It was like she had been entranced. It was a shame really. Freddie was too busy ogling the thin brunet, and all the while he was missing what he used to have. Yeah, Katie sure that was it. The stupid boy should have fallen head over hills for her…not that _bitch. _She was doing just fine sitting here, in the back of the pub, she didn't need to whore herself up on the floor to have proper men to fall at her feet, she told herself when no one could hear.

Just watching the two of them made a burning feeling rise up in her stomach. She was too good for either of them, right? Yeah, she was far too fierce for any of this shit. Besides, why would she settle for a boy who had half a brain, and couldn't really fuck to save his life. For now, she had told herself, she'd watch…for humor, that was all. But, that was pretty much a lie at this point.

"Jealous Katie?" A snicker was matched by the appearance of a short haired blond.

"Fucks sake" slipped past Katie's lips as she turned her face to glare at Naomi Campbell. _That fucking lezza. _Katie tilted her glass up to her lips and let the liquor burn down her throat. "What's there to be, like, jealous of?"

"Well, I don't know Katie, you tell me." God, Katie hated that tone Naomi always seemed to carry in her voice. And then, there was that stupid roll of her eyes.

Her eyes fluttered closed as she opened her mouth to reply. A breath swept out from between her lips. There wasn't anything she had to admit. At least not to Naomi Campbell, the girlfriend of her twin. It was time for her to get away, and speed out of here. She couldn't stand it any longer. Everything was suffocating her. And she needed to _escape. _

Her lips twitched upwards into a self sufficiant smirk as she tilted her head up slightly. Lids fluttered back open as Katie shot Naomi back a look and finished off her drink. Shoving herself off the barstool, and settling the glass down she turned her body away from the snickering blond. With a heavy sigh and a shrug of her shoulders Katie finally replied back.

"Like I said there's like, nothing to be jealous of." Katie stared down at the floor, and lowered her voice. " I don't **need **to be jealous of him...or _her_"

As she headed toward the exit, Katie turned to catch Effy's steely gaze. A shock shook her body, and Katie couldn't fight back the shudder that enveloped her. The Stonem had some sort effect on her, and it was sickening really. She bit her lip to the point it bled to try and stop herself from giving off a low purr of delight as Effy approached her. That night the darkly lit bathroom stall door slammed shut, and screams mixed into the air, blending with the pounding music.

It wasn't _love. _But, Katie would take what she could. Even if in the morning she'd bend over the toilet, close her eyes, and throw up till she felt normal again...

---

"No offense Ems, but why are we here?" boredom laced Katie's voice as the girl looked about the flower store.

All she recieved in return was a silence. _Jesus christ, Ems. _Ran through Katie's mind. Rolling her eyes, she prepared herself to turn dramatically. "Ems honestly--"

"Hi Effy, Pandora" she heard Emily say in greeting.

"Oh whizzer, hi." Pandora replied in return.

Katie's face dropped as she finally turned to come face to face with Pandora and _Effy. _The smirk that was glued to the Stonem's facial features made Katie feel sick, god, what she wouldn't give to smack that smug look off her beautiful face. A frown twitched onto her face as a look of disdain passed through her.

"Katie." Effy's electric blue eyes held onto the chocolate orbs of the bitchier twin.

"Oh, yeah, hi Effy. Didn't know you, like, fancied flowers." She turned her head, breaking off the gaze. She wouldn't allow herself to give into Effy, she was stronger than that. And Katie knew that Effy could look into anyone's soul with those eyes...even her own soul.

"I don't...." came the aloof reply.

Emily was beside her now, looking at one flower. It was pretty enough, Katie supposed. But she wasn't quite sure what it was. Effy, the Fitch had noticed, was now looking at the flower before turning her gaze back to her.

"Like, what kind of flower is that, Ems" murmured Katie as she tried to shake off the attention she was recieving from the brunet girl.

"It's a lily" came Emily's lowered voice. "It's lovely isn't it? There's a intense meaning behind it."

"Oh, yeah..its beautiful and all" Katie replied rather distracted.

"What's it mean?" Effy's voice was like thunder rumbling in Katie's ear, forcing her attention on the thin female.

"The lily means...I dare you to _love _me." was the response, and it was innocent enough.

Katie bit down on her bottom lip as her gaze caught onto Effy's. That smirk was taunting her, and there it was...that infamous arched eyebrow.

"How ironic, right Katie?" there was something cold in the Stonem's words, chilled enough to make Katie's hairs stand on end.

"Whatever..."

And later that night, as she was curled up in her sheets, with only Emily's labored breathing in the air, Katie was left to her thoughts. It was then, with her thoughts running wild that she realized that she didn't think she could ever dare herself to _love _Effy Stonem. It would hurt to much to do so.


End file.
